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Dogs & Dollars

IMG_0731[1] IMG_0729[1]This is an old photo of Ophelia with some of my first ever sex work earnings. She’s a shy girl but she knows how to work the camera. xx

Sex workers, send us your pictures of your dogs and dollars or cats and stacks at info@titsandsass.com

Is this real?

A while ago I stumbled across this wikiHow article on dating strippers. It gives nine easy “steps” for snagging the showgirl of your dreams—which are actually useless, demeaning and stereotype-laced suggestions for how to be one of those obnoxious time wasters that we all talk shit about in the dressing room.

Like this, for example, Step Number Six: “Tip her on stage, but don’t get a lap dance from anyone. If you pay for a lap dance from her, she will consider you a ‘regular’ …  She will never date you once that business relationship with her is established.”

Pretty please, just stay home if you are going to be that guy.

Dogs & Dollars

When Honey Badger’s dog Mavis PieMan Draper’s on stage, it’s a minimum of one treat per song tip.

Want to submit your pet and (not so) petty cash photos to us? Email info[at]titsandsass.com

Buyer’s Remorse and Intoxication at the Strip Club

by flickr4jazz, on Flickr

In the past few years there has been a rash of business men declining to pay their strip club credit card charges. For some unimaginable reason, a guy who racks up a $28,000 titty bar bill at New York’s Hustler Club doesn’t inspire a lot of sympathy. Are they victims of predatory vendors or are they morons with buyer’s remorse? Next to casinos, strip clubs are the businesses least likely to cut someone off as long as they are spending money. Of course, I’ve also known customers who take a pretty “law of the jungle” approach to their strip bar experiences—although usually for a few hundred to a couple thousand instead of $28K.

Journalists get too distracted by stripper-puns (“mammary mecca”? Really?) to provide us with a lot of facts, so I’m left with a few questions. What evidence does the club have that the customer knew what he was paying for? Did he sign for each round or only at the end of the night? How many drinks did he have? Did he have them all at the club? How drunk did he appear? And the obvious: Did he actually consume $28,000 in goods and services, or is that bill padded?

Stacks & Cats

sugarHere’s a photo of my cat, Sugar, counting my riches after an extra successful weekend—Valentine, a sex worker in Portland, OR.

Sex workers, send us your pictures of your dogs and dollars or cats and stacks at info@titsandsass.com