Few television characters embody the Douche Client more perfectly than Zapp Brannigan. You know the type: massive yet fragile ego that requires constant stroking, weird obsession with own perceived attractiveness, and a stable of skin-crawlingly irritating “seduction” techniques.
Once a client asked me to wait to lie down because he just needed to move the Chanel bedspread. He also told me his spa pool was made of imported marble. He did not tip. I bet Zapp never tips.
So many feelings, and they’re all your problem.
We’ve all encountered this guy too:
Who for some reason is often also this guy:
Sometimes, you just have to shut that shit down.
Futurama also understands the complex banalities of the sex worker lifestyle:
Sometimes when I read my escort advert I almost buy into my own hype, but then I remember that I wrote it while drinking in bed at 3 in the afternoon, surrounded by empty beer cans and wearing a t-shirt that hadn’t (let’s be honest, still hasn’t) been washed in 4 months.
Never has a single youtube clip better encapsulated my entire work philosophy:
Finally, Futurama reminds us that nothing feels better than letting it all hang out after a long day or night.
A drink never hurt anyone either.