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If I Can’t Sell It, I’ll Keep Sittin’ On It: On Never Running Specials

We’ve survived August, which for many escorts is the slowest month of the year. Wealthy clients all seem to be either on family vacations, or else catching up with everything they missed at work because they just got back from family vacations. Clients on a budget are trying to get the kids to the beach and back to school or are cutting large tuition checks. Summer specials are popping up everywhere to help girls compete. Time to pull out the laptop and drop your rates til September.

Or, you know. Don’t.

Running a special can backfire and weaken your brand. Clients who usually see you at $300 an hour may begin waiting for your specials if you routinely drop to $250 any time your week looks slow. Clients who begin seeing you under a special rate may feel mistakenly entitled to continue seeing you at that rate for all of eternity. Clients who jump on specials tend to be bargain hunters looking to get the most bang out of their buck, and don’t stick around to become loyal, long term clients. And, perhaps most discouragingly, good clients who would see you at your full rate may wonder why you’re dropping it, and whether they should reconsider. Besides, who wants to do the same job, but for less money?

Of course, there are other options, and you don’t have to decide between moonlighting at Starbucks or jumping into The Race To The Cheapest Blow Job with every other girl in town. Before dropping your rates, consider trying to enhance your business instead.

Kat’s Paycation Guide

Strip tripping can be fun and lucrative, or you can come back with less money and an ego so bruised that you’ll change the subject whenever anyone asks about that trip that you wouldn’t shut up about before you left. There was the time that I went to Indianapolis during the Indy 500 because a lonely juggalette stripper on the Internet told me I’d make like ten thousand dollars, minimum. And then there was the time that I just showed up in Hawaii and had to eat Burger King and Subway for a week. I would like to think that I know what I’m doing by now, and since I’m not nice enough to tell you where the money’s good, I’ll at least share tips that have made my life easier. This list is inspired by badass seasoned road stripper Story’s advice, so please look at it first.

Through Being Cool: If Vegas is on your stripper bucket list, or you can’t stop looking at everyone’s Guam Facebook pics, then I won’t stop you from going to the popular stripping destinations. But I think you’re going to have more luck at the club in the middle of nowhere that you’ve never heard of. You know why you’ve never heard of it? Because strippers keep the best places to themselves. Get rustic. Is the customer riding a horse around the parking lot not a big deal? Do the dancers pee in the dressing room trashcan? Go there.

The Name Game: Privacy in the Cyber Age

The pseudonym is perhaps one of the most titillating aspects of sex work. Non-sex workers are intrigued by the names we choose to define our personas; there are a million little devices to help them even create their own hypothetical sex worker name. Names can seem insignificant or interchangeable, but over time they become such an intensely personal, integral part of a worker’s identity. Sex work is already taboo, so picking a name has limitless bounds—we can come up with the most absurd, unconventional, socially unacceptable creation. No wonder civilians are so captivated; we get the opportunity to let our freak flag fly high and call it whatever the fuck we want.

It’s a common misconception that sex workers operate under different names because we’re ashamed of our work. The issue comes up even more as sex workers have carved out a space in the world of social media. Since many types of sex work are illegal, sex work (hell, even sex blogging) carries a huge stigma, and most of us would like to create a space where our clients can’t track down our parents or partners. Creating a fantasy is part of our job description; we may be a client’s Manic Pixie Dream Girl in the workplace, but that doesn’t mean we stop having private lives.

NBA Enters Into Agreement To License Stripper Heels

Instead of Pleaser or Ellie, the NBA went with a sports clothing company called HerStar to make these stripperific platform pumps. While civilians have been wearing 6″ platforms for a few years now, these blingy things will show up on the pole soon enough.

These are perfect for dancers, but for female sports fans? Jerseys that fit would be a nice gesture, too, for those times you don’t feel like wearing 6″ pumps to a game. We strippers are always capable of cutting up and altering shirts to wear as hootchie halter tops in the club.

Pay Your Damn Taxes: Happy Tax Day!

just file

Happy Tax Day! I don’t know why we got an extra day after Sunday to file, but it’s not like it made a difference for me, because I thankfully have an accountant handling my mess. If you are a sex worker who is maybe confused about how to handle filing, how to determine if you’re an employee or self-employed, or why you should file at all if you’re paid entirely in cash, please look at our post from last year, “Five Reasons Sex Workers File Their Damn Taxes.”

Melissa Gira Grant spoke to Buzzfeed about sex workers and taxes.

We’ve had a series of posts about how strip club owners have been tripped up by failing to pay their damn taxes.

Here’s a post by Story about her helpful accountant.

And here’s one I wrote about my own tax issues.

You might like to check out the Tax Domme, who is very knowledgeable about the industry.

Strip and Grow Rich also provides helpful tax advice for strippers.

If you’re on the fence about filing or nervous because you haven’t filed in the past, it’s really not as scary as you think. And it’s definitely better to deal with it yourself than to be made to deal with it down the road. Please feel free to post any tax-related questions in the comments and we’ll be happy to give you our (totally not professional and completely informal because we are not tax professionals et cetera) thoughts.