Bubbles Burbujas is a career stripper who started dancing while Clinton was in office. She has a B.A. in English and enjoys playing totally inappropriate obscure music at work.
Fittingly, this championship game sees two songs that might as well be strip club furniture. I’ve heard them so often that they don’t even register as music anymore. First, from the Dance/Pop region, victorious over “Pony,” is Nine Inch Nails’ “Closer.”
And their opponent is “Pour Some Sugar On Me,” from the Classics region.
If you’d like to review their path to the championship game, you can see the full bracket here. Voting is open until midnight PST Sunday night and our champion will be announced Monday.
And then there were four one seeds and a ten seed left. Readers, your final candidates. Voting is open until midnight TONIGHT and the championship match will be announced tomorrow with voting open until Sunday night. But let’s be honest, “Pony” or “Closer,” that’s the real contest. Here’s the full bracket if you’d like to review how the contest has played out up until now.
“Pony” and “Closer” continue to dominate their respective regions. Can “Drop It Like It’s Hot” credibly challenge “Pony?” “Fuck The Pain Away” has a reasonable shot at “Closer” thanks to its consistently strong showing, but I hope we aren’t deprived of a semifinal matchup between Ginuwine and Nine Inch Nails. “I Touch Myself” has pulled off a major upset of “Girls, Girls, Girls” to compete with “Pour Some Sugar On Me” for the Classics title, and the Rock region trends ever gothier as “The Beautiful People” and “More Human Than Human” face off.
Voting is open now until Thursday, when the Final Four will be announced.
The Hip Hop/R&B region has played out in surprising fashion, with three double-digit seeds moving into the Sweet Sixteen. Unsurprisingly, “Pony” continues its domination of the field, next facing Khia’s ode to cunnilingus, “My Neck, My Back,” fresh off a decisive pounding of “Perfect Gentleman.” Telling a dude to go down > Captain
Save-a-ho. [READ MORE]
Thanks to everyone who voted in the first round through the weekend! The field is down to 32 songs, and if you want to jump straight to the results, here is the bracket with the first round winners. Here is a Spotify playlist. Let’s move on to the second round, where you’ll cast your votes to decide who moves on into the Sweet Sixteen. Voting is open until 12am PST Thursday and the next round will be announced Thursday morning. Voting is open to everyone.
The Rock bracket had disappointing showings for “Black No. 1″ and “Walk,” but I was impressed that everyone hates Nickelback SO MUCH that you knocked out the #2 seed right at the start. The second round matchup to watch? “Prison Sex” vs “Crazy Bitch.” Who will come out ahead? The durable goth/metal 90s hit or the deathless, awful Buckcherry anthem? If your unsurprising rock votes are any predictor, I’m going with Buckcherry. It’s like choosing between Sweatpants Boner Man and Guy With Shit Breath. [READ MORE]
